What has the world come to? As if cell phones and texting didn't already put a damper on peoples ability to have a conversation with someone, everyone and their mother (including mine) is on facebook. Before Facebook, it was Myspace...another classic way to stalk your friends and waste a lot of time decorating your page. Been there, done that....stupid! Anyway, Facebook is the devil! Why are people so wrapped up in things on facebook? Status updates, ugh! One, two, maybe a couple updates a day are ok. Usually they are funny little updates about random things that have happened during your day. The ones I don't get, "I just woke up" 5 minutes later "I drank coffee" 5 minutes later "Need to take a shower" 5 minutes later "Don't want to go to work" 5 minutes later "Driving down the road" 5 minutes later "Just got into an accident because I'm updating my FB status while driving". You get the picture! Those people that feel the need to tell Facebook everything they are doing throughout the day, where you are, who you're with, what color your pee was in the morning, etc. Do you really think people give a shit??
Thank god for "hide" buttons on Facebook so you can hide those Facebook overachieving, annoying people! Now, as if the status updates weren't enough, you can check-in to a place and let the facebook world know "Jack has checked in at home" or "Jill is at Walmart" WHO FRICKIN CARES??? Are you telling me that you have nothing better to do in your life that before you walk into a place, you have to get on Facebook on your phone and let people know you're grocery shopping? Seriously!
Is Facebook annoying yet? YES! But, there is more....yes, more! Games....or are they really games or just another useless way to kill time and drive people crazy? I swear to god, whoever created Farmville, Cityville, Sorority Girls, Mafia Wars and all those other stupid things should get a size 14 boot up their ass! I don't care if people want to play them, more power to you but STOP sending me requests to help you grow corn or catch a cow. I don't play that shit, never have, never will....stop sending me 100 requests a day! It's not going to change my mind and while you're wasting your time sending me these stupid "join my farm" requests, I'm thinking you're a dumbass that needs a hobby! Why is Facebook trying to make everyone nuts? Oh yes, so they can make more money!
Speaking of money....who in their right mind spends money on Facebook Credits? Need I even ask? Probably those people that send out 1000 "feed my pig" requests! Something about spending money on Facebook credits to play games, buy "upgrades" on games and crap like that doesn't make sense to me. Someone please enlighten me as to why people find it necessary to buy this crap? Now, let me make this clear! I am NOT asking why people play these games...I already know the answer to that. In fact, many people have told me it's a mindless way to wind down at night, killing time before bed. To each their own, but STOP sending me the damn -Villes solicitations!
Tuesday, February 22, 2011
Monday, February 21, 2011
Unsolicited Advice
After posting something to my girls on my baby board, I feel the need to blog about this! Unsolicited Advice!! Everyone has those "know-it all" friends or family members that have something to say about everything you do, or don't do. Whether it be the way you cook, clean, shop, tie your shoes, raise your child right down to the way you should fold your bath towels....everyone has their own opinion on what works for them. When does a person draw the line on dishing out unsolicited advice? Now, before I get too far into this, I must say there IS a difference between trying to be helpful with advice and sharing stories of what may work or has worked for someone else. The problem arises when someone is constantly saying something should be done this way or that way, telling you how to raise your child up to someone elses standards or telling you what you've been doing for days/months/years isn't the "right" way, even though it works for you.
Let me give a few examples of what has happened to me. Names have been changed to protect the identities of potential advice violators.
1) Washing laundry: I have been doing laundry for years. Many more years than some people have been alive. What I do works for me, my clothes are clean and it's not a problem...for me anyway. Here is what I do. I seperate reds, darks, jeans, towels, Rylan's clothes, Joel's work clothes and whites. Apparently this is incorrect. Unsolicited advice given now: whites need to be seperated as well, into whites and socks. Socks get their own load. Not only their own load, but they must soak in bleach overnight in a seperate container. Not gonna happen in my world but thanks for trying!
2) How to raise your child: This is a big one that is often on the fence about trying to help and unsolicited advice. Giving helpful tips on what may work to soothe a child, enhance feeding, making more comfortable, etc is always welcome! Anything to make something easier in the arms of a child is GREAT! The problem comes when people say someone should do something one way or another. Point taken here: "it works better if you feed your baby solid food when he's starving, he'll eat more and won't eat as much formula, which will save you money" thank you for trying to save me money but solids in the form of baby food are not a caloric intake, therefore not giving baby the appropriate nutrition needed and he still needs the same amount of formula. Point taken here: you should never take your child outdoors when it's windy or chilly outside, they will get sick. Again, thanks for the concern about MY child but here's a little fact, germs make you sick, not cold! And if someone thinks I'm staying cooped up in my house to avoid a little cold weather, they're high. Not to mention, I think someone is making money off the idea that they invented hats, mittens and jackets! Just a few examples.
3) How to fold your clothes: Not sure why this is a big deal to some people, anal retentive much? Again, I've been folding and hanging up my clothes for several years and what I do works for me. Guess I was wrong again! It's been pointed out that the way I fold my clothes makes them have more wrinkles...as if I give a shit? They are lucky to be folded in the first place, usually they get rolled in a ball in the corner of the room, you think I'm worried about wrinkles?
4) My child is better than your child: This is a big one that has happened more than a few times! Those that remember (it's not something I can forget) Rylan has a milk protein intolerance, making him unable to digest milk properly and causing him to be extremely crabby! If we all remember right, there was a solid month where he lost weight, cried and wouldn't sleep. Think I didn't try everything I could to make it better?? I did! Finally he was diagnosed and the problem has since resolved. Meanwhile, I was getting emails, phone calls, text messages, etc giving me any kind of idea to help Rylan or resolve the issue, many of those were greatly appreciated. However, there was one that stands out in my mind where to this day, I still want to kick your ass for even saying it! Point taken here: I receive an email from 'Joan' telling me that her 'friends' baby (who is a month younger than Rylan) weighs more than Rylan, is a happy baby and sleeps just fine. 'Joan' tells me I should contact 'Sally' and get some tips from her on how she gets her baby to cooperate so well, gain weight and sleep great. 'Sally' is a first time mom as well and her baby has no health issues. 'Joan' then proceeds to tell me that 'Sally' is the best mom ever because her baby is so perfect. Here is my thought: take your unsolicited advice and shove it! So because my child has a health issue that made him lose weight and not sleep, that makes me a bad mom? Shove it! A side note on this topic: 'Marge' says "well my baby is crawling all over, or standing or walking, etc.... and he is younger than Rylan" or "well my baby has x amount of teeth and Rylan doesn't have any" GOOD FOR YOUR CHILD! It's not a secret that babies develop at different rates and just because Rylan doesn't have teeth and isn't crawling doesn't mean he's delayed in any way, shape or form. It means he's not biting me and running away!
So these are just a few examples of unsolicited advice, or just outright rudeness! While advice is usually welcomed from most people, offering advice is a tricky subject. You can always say "this is what worked for me" or "you may want to try this" but never, ever, EVER should your advice consist of the words "you should" or "this is the right way".
Let me give a few examples of what has happened to me. Names have been changed to protect the identities of potential advice violators.
1) Washing laundry: I have been doing laundry for years. Many more years than some people have been alive. What I do works for me, my clothes are clean and it's not a problem...for me anyway. Here is what I do. I seperate reds, darks, jeans, towels, Rylan's clothes, Joel's work clothes and whites. Apparently this is incorrect. Unsolicited advice given now: whites need to be seperated as well, into whites and socks. Socks get their own load. Not only their own load, but they must soak in bleach overnight in a seperate container. Not gonna happen in my world but thanks for trying!
2) How to raise your child: This is a big one that is often on the fence about trying to help and unsolicited advice. Giving helpful tips on what may work to soothe a child, enhance feeding, making more comfortable, etc is always welcome! Anything to make something easier in the arms of a child is GREAT! The problem comes when people say someone should do something one way or another. Point taken here: "it works better if you feed your baby solid food when he's starving, he'll eat more and won't eat as much formula, which will save you money" thank you for trying to save me money but solids in the form of baby food are not a caloric intake, therefore not giving baby the appropriate nutrition needed and he still needs the same amount of formula. Point taken here: you should never take your child outdoors when it's windy or chilly outside, they will get sick. Again, thanks for the concern about MY child but here's a little fact, germs make you sick, not cold! And if someone thinks I'm staying cooped up in my house to avoid a little cold weather, they're high. Not to mention, I think someone is making money off the idea that they invented hats, mittens and jackets! Just a few examples.
3) How to fold your clothes: Not sure why this is a big deal to some people, anal retentive much? Again, I've been folding and hanging up my clothes for several years and what I do works for me. Guess I was wrong again! It's been pointed out that the way I fold my clothes makes them have more wrinkles...as if I give a shit? They are lucky to be folded in the first place, usually they get rolled in a ball in the corner of the room, you think I'm worried about wrinkles?
4) My child is better than your child: This is a big one that has happened more than a few times! Those that remember (it's not something I can forget) Rylan has a milk protein intolerance, making him unable to digest milk properly and causing him to be extremely crabby! If we all remember right, there was a solid month where he lost weight, cried and wouldn't sleep. Think I didn't try everything I could to make it better?? I did! Finally he was diagnosed and the problem has since resolved. Meanwhile, I was getting emails, phone calls, text messages, etc giving me any kind of idea to help Rylan or resolve the issue, many of those were greatly appreciated. However, there was one that stands out in my mind where to this day, I still want to kick your ass for even saying it! Point taken here: I receive an email from 'Joan' telling me that her 'friends' baby (who is a month younger than Rylan) weighs more than Rylan, is a happy baby and sleeps just fine. 'Joan' tells me I should contact 'Sally' and get some tips from her on how she gets her baby to cooperate so well, gain weight and sleep great. 'Sally' is a first time mom as well and her baby has no health issues. 'Joan' then proceeds to tell me that 'Sally' is the best mom ever because her baby is so perfect. Here is my thought: take your unsolicited advice and shove it! So because my child has a health issue that made him lose weight and not sleep, that makes me a bad mom? Shove it! A side note on this topic: 'Marge' says "well my baby is crawling all over, or standing or walking, etc.... and he is younger than Rylan" or "well my baby has x amount of teeth and Rylan doesn't have any" GOOD FOR YOUR CHILD! It's not a secret that babies develop at different rates and just because Rylan doesn't have teeth and isn't crawling doesn't mean he's delayed in any way, shape or form. It means he's not biting me and running away!
So these are just a few examples of unsolicited advice, or just outright rudeness! While advice is usually welcomed from most people, offering advice is a tricky subject. You can always say "this is what worked for me" or "you may want to try this" but never, ever, EVER should your advice consist of the words "you should" or "this is the right way".
Sunday, February 20, 2011
Weird Things to Eat
My Strange Addiction, featured on TLC. What the hell is that all about? There is a guy that apparently thinks it's ok to eat glass and swallow bullets! How does this happen? You wake up one day, are eating breakfast and instead of looking at your glass of orange juice to drink it, the glass suddenly screams at you "eat me, this is a good idea"? Last time I checked, glass, metal and gun powder were not in the food groups! The guy on this show, eats champagne glasses, light bulbs, basically anything made of glass. Chews on it like a piece of gum and swallows it. Again I ask, why does this seem like a good idea? A doctor wanted to show him physical evidence that this was not a good idea, obviously telling him eating a glass for dinner was not a wise option wasn't enough for him to hear. He took x-rays the day after a bullet was swallowed. The x-ray showed 8 bullets throughout his stomach and intestines. Probably not the easily digested substance, especially since they were collecting in his body! The doctor tells him there is a good chance the glass he eats can cut his esophagus, stomach, cause internal bleeding, sepsis and death. When the guy leaves, he's on camera saying "I guess I didn't realize how dangerous this could be" DUH! Again I ask, why does this seem like a good idea?? How does someone not realize something that easily cuts your finger when you touch a broken piece of it can very easily cut the insides of you if ingested? So this brings me to my question for the day....
What is the strangest thing you have ever eaten?
What is the strangest thing you have ever eaten?
F*ck you and your French Fries
This is an OLDIE but surely GOODIE! As I was browsing through some old blogs I had posted years ago trying to find some inspiration for upcoming blogs, I came across this one and had to share it once again, mainly for those who have never read it before.
I stole this blog from one of my friends, who undoubtedly deserves nothing but the upmost respect for putting stupid people in their place. Now...enjoy the greatness of his story...it really is GREAT! Love ya man :)
So this story is supposed to be funny, but I can just see it now how much hate mail and negative comments I'm going to get for this...but here goes, I just have to write this and share it with all of you because it's just way too funny to keep in. Enjoy!
So last summer while I was managing a bar down in Burnsville I met this girl named Amber who told me that she thought I was cute. She was a cute little thing herself, she was 22 with medium length blond hair. We talked for a while and before she left she gave me her number. "Here's my number, but I have a boyfriend, so you can be my plan B when we break up."
So about 6 months passed and this past January I get a random text from a number I didn't recognize, asking me to come down to the 1200 Club that night. I responded by asking who it was, and when the reply came back "It's Amber", I told her that since I hadn't heard from her in so long, she didn't make my annual cell phone phone book cleanout (Don't act like you don't do this yourself!)
Fast forward to about 3 weeks ago when she texts me saying that she wants me to meet up with her at the bar cuz it's her friends birthday. I agree to meet up with her and after her telling me that she still has a boyfriend and that she didn't want me making it obvious I was there for her because although her boyfriend wasn't there, a few of his friends were. This girl is freakin trouble I thought to myself, so I finished my beer, said my goodbyes and I left.
The next week she texts me back and says she wants me to meet up with her again and that this time there wouldn't be any "spies" there. So you guessed it, I met up with her. Turns out her and her friends had won a party pack for that Friday, where they get a $70 bar tab. We get to the bar and she quickly finds out that the bar tab cannot be used on the $1 rail drink specials. Being the nice guy that I am and the fact, unbelievably so, that her and her friends didn't bring ANY cash or cards, I bought them all a few rounds of drinks. No big deal. They could still use the tab for shots and drinks after the special ended.
After a fifth round of drinks, I start wondering to myself about this girl and how she is probably starting to think that I could be her sugardaddy and would probably see how far she could take my wallet. Sure as shit, she says, "Rich, I didn't eat dinner tonight. Can you buy me some french fries?"
Now, if you think I can't afford $3.89 for a large order of fries, you're sadly mistaken. What I won't tolerate is someone taking another person for granted. You think I was included on their $70 bar tab? Hell no. And thats exactly what I told her when she asked for some fries. So the next day when I'm laying naked on her bed, what does she do? She blames me for her getting so drunk because I didn't buy her french fries. WTF. Get a job and a clue.
Now, the other day I get a text from her and and she seems like is in a really good mood. I reply to her, "Why are you in such a good mood this morning, did you get some? lol"
Now, whether she did or not is beside the point. Everyone should know the unwritten rule between friends with benefits - "You don't talk about what you do and either will I." So after she replied to me that yes in fact she did, I playfully responded to her that maybe I should make a phone call and get some myself.
"Oh yeah, from who?"
"I don't know, why don't you pick a letter of the alphabet?"
"A" (she more than likely wanted me to respond with her name, Amber)
"Good call. How about Amy, Angela, Amanda, Andrea, or Alison?"
"Fuck you", she tells me.
Which leads me to today. I get a text from her tonight asking me if I got laid last night or not. "No I didn't, but I did get some roadhead."
"Yeah right, I don't believe you."
"Well, I told you to pick a letter, you picked A, and I picked Angie."
"So you called some bitch to give you a blowjob??? How much did you have to pay her?" I laughed because even though with that comment she thought she had the best of me, I knew in fact that she didn't.
"I didn't have to pay her shit, but I did buy her some french fries."
"FUCK YOU!!!"
I stole this blog from one of my friends, who undoubtedly deserves nothing but the upmost respect for putting stupid people in their place. Now...enjoy the greatness of his story...it really is GREAT! Love ya man :)
So this story is supposed to be funny, but I can just see it now how much hate mail and negative comments I'm going to get for this...but here goes, I just have to write this and share it with all of you because it's just way too funny to keep in. Enjoy!
So last summer while I was managing a bar down in Burnsville I met this girl named Amber who told me that she thought I was cute. She was a cute little thing herself, she was 22 with medium length blond hair. We talked for a while and before she left she gave me her number. "Here's my number, but I have a boyfriend, so you can be my plan B when we break up."
So about 6 months passed and this past January I get a random text from a number I didn't recognize, asking me to come down to the 1200 Club that night. I responded by asking who it was, and when the reply came back "It's Amber", I told her that since I hadn't heard from her in so long, she didn't make my annual cell phone phone book cleanout (Don't act like you don't do this yourself!)
Fast forward to about 3 weeks ago when she texts me saying that she wants me to meet up with her at the bar cuz it's her friends birthday. I agree to meet up with her and after her telling me that she still has a boyfriend and that she didn't want me making it obvious I was there for her because although her boyfriend wasn't there, a few of his friends were. This girl is freakin trouble I thought to myself, so I finished my beer, said my goodbyes and I left.
The next week she texts me back and says she wants me to meet up with her again and that this time there wouldn't be any "spies" there. So you guessed it, I met up with her. Turns out her and her friends had won a party pack for that Friday, where they get a $70 bar tab. We get to the bar and she quickly finds out that the bar tab cannot be used on the $1 rail drink specials. Being the nice guy that I am and the fact, unbelievably so, that her and her friends didn't bring ANY cash or cards, I bought them all a few rounds of drinks. No big deal. They could still use the tab for shots and drinks after the special ended.
After a fifth round of drinks, I start wondering to myself about this girl and how she is probably starting to think that I could be her sugardaddy and would probably see how far she could take my wallet. Sure as shit, she says, "Rich, I didn't eat dinner tonight. Can you buy me some french fries?"
Now, if you think I can't afford $3.89 for a large order of fries, you're sadly mistaken. What I won't tolerate is someone taking another person for granted. You think I was included on their $70 bar tab? Hell no. And thats exactly what I told her when she asked for some fries. So the next day when I'm laying naked on her bed, what does she do? She blames me for her getting so drunk because I didn't buy her french fries. WTF. Get a job and a clue.
Now, the other day I get a text from her and and she seems like is in a really good mood. I reply to her, "Why are you in such a good mood this morning, did you get some? lol"
Now, whether she did or not is beside the point. Everyone should know the unwritten rule between friends with benefits - "You don't talk about what you do and either will I." So after she replied to me that yes in fact she did, I playfully responded to her that maybe I should make a phone call and get some myself.
"Oh yeah, from who?"
"I don't know, why don't you pick a letter of the alphabet?"
"A" (she more than likely wanted me to respond with her name, Amber)
"Good call. How about Amy, Angela, Amanda, Andrea, or Alison?"
"Fuck you", she tells me.
Which leads me to today. I get a text from her tonight asking me if I got laid last night or not. "No I didn't, but I did get some roadhead."
"Yeah right, I don't believe you."
"Well, I told you to pick a letter, you picked A, and I picked Angie."
"So you called some bitch to give you a blowjob??? How much did you have to pay her?" I laughed because even though with that comment she thought she had the best of me, I knew in fact that she didn't.
"I didn't have to pay her shit, but I did buy her some french fries."
"FUCK YOU!!!"
Saturday, February 19, 2011
Why is it Common Sense?
Have you ever found yourself having a conversation with someone, saying the phrase "it's common sense" and quickly realizing they still don't get it? There is one explanation for that. Common sense is NOT common! Sad but true....so why is it called 'common sense'? Let me break this down for you by definition. Common: occurring or appearing frequently. Sense: a meaning conveyed or intended; conscious awareness or rationality. Hmmm...so these 2 words alone make it seem as though they would go together and make a brillant concept and in fact, mean someone might have the frequent ability to be aware of something or that a conscious rationale could occur. Why when you put those 2 great words together to form "common sense" it screws everything up? Common sense: sound and prudent judgment based on a simple perception of the situation or facts. So what this says to me is, a person can be common or a person can have sense but if they don't have common sense, it is because their perception of the situation is blurred by having their head up their ass. Although common sense is not common, don't worry! Head up ass syndrome has made its way around the world quicker than the flu! Too bad their isn't a vaccine for that.
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